Thanks for everyone who wished my son Alex well, on his hydrocele surgery yesterday--not serious, but not fun. He's up and running around already (even though his doctor would hate to hear that).
We had a GREAT experience at Children's Hospital in Seattle. Great doctors, nurses, staff. Fun waiting rooms. Very kid-friendly. And they knew how to put Alex at ease.
Saturday, we spent the day in Bellingham, at the Washington Championship Taekwondo Open. It was a long day, but it was fun to be at our first tournament. The kids did pretty well! Alex won two bronze medals (for poomsay or forms, and for sparring), Stephen won on one silver, one bronze, Alyssa won a gold medal for her forms and a silver medal for her sparring, and I won a bronze for sparring.
I paid how much to get beat up?
One of the toughest things about being a foster parent is when "your baby" ends up going home to his birth parent. Zach has been with our family since the day after he was born. Today, my wife dropped him off for the last time, to his birth mother.
It's probably nothing like the grief and emptiness someone feels when a child dies, but knowing that we might not see him again is heartbreaking still the same. This little boy has been a part of our family for almost a year.
Sometimes when I talk to people about foster care, or even about adoption, they say they could never do foster care because of the pain of letting go. True, it's painful. But completely bonding with the child is the best thing for the child, and as adults, we have the emotional equipment to handle the pain. It's worst 
not to attach completely.
All in all, we're happy for Zach. He should be with his mother. And having him in foster care was the exact thing she needed to commit to getting her life together--hopefully, two lives were saved in the process: Zach's, and Zach's young mother.
We're going to miss him terribly. My wife and my 6-year old daughter have cried ceaselessly all day. And my six-year-old boy got in a fight at school, and blamed my wife and me for not loving the baby enough. I process the pain differently than they do, but today's been full of deep emotion and strong melancholy.
My wife wrote this poem today. I don't expect his birth mother to ever feel like she shared her role as "mother" to this little boy, but we'll always consider Zach part of our family...
Your Little Child & Mine
One cherished child whose soul alights
Needs you for a little while to teach
Oh, mourn not for your heartfelt plights;
Which of you has learned to reach?
One blessed child whose very life’s a gift
Must find the way back home.
Oh, dream not that he is yours alone to keep,
Or that it is your soul only
that is lifted by his light.
~ Jerilyn Porcaro
On Saturday afternoon, I took Stephen, Alex, Alyssa, and Emily on a short hike, to Big Four Ice Caves, near Granite Falls. The hike is only about half a mile, with about 200 feet elevation gain, so it made the perfect hike for the whole family. Emily (3) made it about half-way, before I had to throw her in the backpack carrier.
More photos on Flickr.
On Saturday, March 5, I was in the yard doing some cleaning up. We have a good size burn pile, and it's been dry enough that I knew I could get them burned and cleaned up. All the kids except Alex were off on a playdate, so it was a perfect time to start a raging fire. And he was busy with his friends in a different part of the yard.
I grabbed what I thought was a can of diesel fuel. I've started dozens of fires using diesel fuel, because it burns fairly slowly. I had, in fact, grabbed a can that had regular gasoline, and dumped a quart or so on the sticks to get the fire going. I leaned in close to light the fire, and immediately heard a loud "whoosh" as my sight filled with flames. I was blown backwards, and almost immediately I knew what had happened. I heard my poly-pro jacket burning, so I quickly dropped onto into the dirt and rolled around to make sure I wasn't on fire.
I grabbed the gas can to make sure it wasn't near the fire, made sure Alex wasn't anywhere near, and ran inside to get my face and arms in some cold water. Our friend Lillian was inside with the baby, and I had her call 911.
Within a few minutes, I was in an ambulance, heading to our local hospital. The medic knew I was in a lot of pain, thank goodness he gave me some morphine as soon as I was in the ambulance. My wife met me at the entrance of the ER.
Once they stabilized me at the local hospital, they moved me to our regional burn center, Harborview Medical Center in downtown Seattle. I had 3rd degree burns on both hands, and on most of my face.
I spent the next 24 hours in Intensive Care, where they closely monitored swelling and breathing to make sure I hadn't damaged my airway or lungs. Within a few hours my parents arrived from Salt Lake City. My sister offered some of her family's frequent flier points, and they were able to catch a flight almost immediately. It was very comforting to see my mom and dad, and know they could help with the kids for a few days, and spend some time with me in the hospital.
I spent the next week in Burn Center making sure I'd heal up. Even though I had to share a room with a stranger (something I haven't had to do for years!), I was able to get some rest and deal with the daily pain of cleaning and dressing the wounds.
I've been home from work for almost two weeks, and I can't wait to head back in on Monday. I've been sleeping a lot, and have been weaning myself from the pain medication they gave me, so I can stay awake more than an hour or two at a time! Mostly, I've been getting restless and bored, though I can't find the energy to do anything for more than a little while before I want to head back to sleep.
I've been overwhelmed with the amount of support, prayers, and well-wishes from my family, neighbors, co-workers, and people from our church. We've had someone helping around the house almost every day, and Jeri's been able to spend a lot of time with me in the hospital, and as I've recovered. I'm amazed at how kind everyone's been about helping, bringing food, watching the kids, and more. And I've gotten flowers and cards and email from so many folks I work with, that I feel more connected and cared about than I have in months. Thanks, everyone...
I had a clinic visit yesterday, and I was told I'll heal completely (though they're looking at one of my hands to see if I'll need a graft, but it looks unlikely). Hopefully, there will be no scarring, and as long as I stay out of the sun, the skin will grow normally over the next few months. In fact, everyone's pretty amazed at how quickly my skin is healing up (hard to believe the difference in the photos from just a week ago).
Enjoy the pictures, hope they don't gross you out too much! I'll post a few more photos on our family web site.
Day One, Intensive Care
Day One
Day One
In the "tank room" of the burn unit (not a fun place).
At home, on day Seven
The hands hurt the worst...
After about ten days (taken Wednesday)
...to eat some spaghetti with Freddy."
My kids LOVE those music breaks from Laurie Berkner on Noggin.
Can I let you in on a secret? The other night I was flipping through some recorded shows, and found that song. I watched it three times, then did the same with "We Are The Dinosaurs, Whaddya Think of That?".
Not sure if it's that my kids love the songs so much, or if it's the kid in me...
Everybody sing along! "Victor Vito, and Freddy Vasco..."
Alyssa, Stephen, and Stephen's friend Mathew spent the day skiing at Steven's Pass. The temperature at the top of the lift was around 5F (-15C). BRRRR! Stephen and Alyssa both went on the chair lifts (twice!) for the first time, and really enjoyed skiing down the beginner trails. They stayed on their feet (mostly), and didn't want to leave (a good sign with young kids). Talk about a proud papa!
On New Year's Eve, Stephen, Alyssa, and Alex had their first ski lessons, and did pretty well. My wife was talking about it the other day, and reminded me that when we were first married (20 years ago!), we talked about buying little ski suits and little skis and teaching our kids to ski. Even though it took 20 years, it was magical to see the realization of that dream!
As for their dad, I had a great time skiing for the first time in a few years. Growing up 20 minutes from Sundance, I skied three times a week during the season. Having kids slowed that down a bit, but now that their old enough to go with me, I hope to get up there more often.
